Angelo and Harvey had just walked into the corner quick stop to grab some snacks and soda when the news came in dispatching them to an emergency call from deputy Tidwell. They quickly paid for their snacks and rushed out the door, hearing the familiar bell tone as they left. They were fifteen miles away, sirens blaring and lights flashing. As they sped through the town, Harvey got as much prepared as possible while Angelo navigated the turns of the streets with the ease and expertise that could only come from someone who had grown up on those streets. Angelo’s mother had been a nurse, mostly working night shifts, so Angelo knew all of the roads better than almost anyone.

As they grew nearer to the apartments, Angelo had to swerve to avoid hitting a tall man walking down the middle of the street. Wearing jeans and a black hooded sweatshirt, he gave them a wide smile as they passed. The ambulance screeched to a halt behind Jake’s patrol car and turned off its sirens. Angelo and Harvey hurriedly climbed down from their seats and approached the open door. They had seen their share of horrific events but were very uneasy this time. They approached the doorway with caution and called out “Deputy” but got no answer. Harvey pulled out his flashlight and reached inside the doorway for the light switch but found it broken. He told Angelo to pull the ambulance closer and put the headlights inside for better lighting. Harvey walked inside, slowly shining his light around him as he wound his way over and through the garbage that littered the floor while Angelo finished moving the ambulance and shone the high beams clearly through the front window and doorway. Harvey saw Jake and, putting caution aside, rushed to the officer while shouting to his partner to call in, letting them know they had an officer down and to send more police. Harvey saw the blood soaked uniform. He grabbed Jake by the shoulders and started to lay him down when his head flopped backwards with a wet, sticky sound, exposing the bloody wound. Harvey laid Jake down to see where his neck had been opened. He felt for a pulse but Jake’s body had begun to get cold. He turned around and saw Lucy through the bathroom doorway in a sitting but slumped over position and called to Angelo to alert the coroner. Although Lucy’s limp body was in better shape than Jake’s, it only took Harvey a second to realize she was also dead. As Harvey stood back up, his eyes flashed to a massive dent in the wall right above where Jake had been, as though he had been lifted and violently thrown into the wall. Knowing there wasn’t anything they could do, Harvey and Angelo walked back outside and waited for the coroner and the police to show up. “I don’t know what happened in there but it was bad, ” said Harvey. Angelo just lowered his head and slowly shook it while he drew a cigarette from his pack and lit it.

As they sat outside in silence, Angelo crushed his cigarette out on the vehicle’s metal step bumper. Then he heard a sound coming from inside the apartment.

 “Are you sure they are both dead?” Angelo asked Harvey.

“Without a doubt, ” he replied. In the distance they could hear the wail of police sirens.

“I heard a sound from inside, ” Angelo said.

 “Let’s wait for the police, ” Harvey replied. As the two stood facing the doorway, they noticed a few lights had come on in other apartments. Curious faces were peering out from behind curtains. One man had walked outside wearing nothing but some blue striped boxer shorts and a shirt that read ‘Spliff Happens’ with a picture of a joint on it. “Go back inside sir, ” Harvey said to the man who shot him a foul look then slammed the door behind him. The rustling sound from inside the apartment grew louder. As they stood there waiting for the police to arrive, they decided to get back inside of the ambulance. After turning off the strobe lights, they went to dim the head lights but what they saw temporarily paralyzed them both. There, bracing himself against the wooden doorway, was deputy Jake Tidwell, covered in blood and extremely pale, nearly blue. Blood still dripping off his neck, his head flopped forward with his hair matted and wet. They got out of the vehicle and could hear him drawing sharp, gasping breaths. They saw him begin standing a little straighter and the color returning to his body, looking all of his six-foot seven inches. His large muscular chest was heaving with every inhale. The wound on his neck was closing up, slowly at first but more rapidly every second. Their jaws fell open. Jake lifted his head and his eyes, once blue but now a bright golden orange, pierced through them as though he could see the very stains of their soul. (Lots more to come)

Advertisements
Comments
  1. mtmedlock says:

    I don’t know if you’re attempting a syntax stylistic flourish, but the lack of commas and capitalization in the dialogue breaks is very distracting, in my opinion. It’s well-written and expressive, but could use a serious edit for punctuation, run-on sentences, and the like. Good luck.

    • graytrimant says:

      Thank you for your constructive criticism. I wrote this in a hurry and really didn’t edit at all but I am always looking for ways to improve my writing. I did some editing and would appreciate your opinion on the revised piece.

  2. Afrolivia says:

    Reblogged this on Afrolivia and commented:
    Reblogging the forth part of the original fiction story “The Coming”. Check out this blog to read the other parts! Will be waiting for more later tonight 🙂

  3. Nicola Young says:

    Thanks for sharing this on #FridayFiction. Just read all four extracts. It’s an interesting premise. Had me hooked. The only thing that didn’t fit, for me, was the flash back that Jake had of when he was a boy. It detracts from the tension of the moment.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s